ch ch changes.

hmm... no pictures yet. just wanted to blog. get my thoughts down on a pad.
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sorry... im watching friends and ross just said the STUPIDEST line ever.
*just after arguing about how ross cheated on rachel. break=ok to sleep with other girl? naaat*

ross: what, tell me what you're thinking...

rachel: im thinking... i wanna order a pizza.

ross: order a pizza like... i forgive you?

HAHAHAHAHA SO STUPID!!!
<3 friends.
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so anyways... iono. i look at how guys are sometimes. some guys. a lot of guys. and i'm SO GLAD my parents raised me how i am and that i grew up going to church like... every single sunday since i was a baby. people think that church is like... so lame or stupid because it tells you how to run your life...

nope.

it seriously helps you know what's right and what's wrong. it's not about going to church so you can get forgiven for everything you've done that week bad so you can be clean then you're safe another week til the next sunday. God really speaks to you about what is most important in your life and what He wants you to grow up knowing and ultimately who you become.

you know, i've talked to a lot of girls through a lot of problems. that's just who i am. i like the company and i like to listen and help in anyway that i can. then usually somewhere in our conversation, i get the line...

"i wish all guys were like you, romeo"

it always makes me kinda chuckle inside because... iono. i feel kinda like a step above the rest kuz im not THAT GUY who's out there just to get laid and im not THAT GUY who will party it up all the time and end up doing something stupid that seemed cool at the time but had no lasting effects. been there, done that. it's not worth it.

but God. He is seriously worth it. i'm the way i am in life because of just Him. only Him. if it wasn't for God, my parents wouldn't have brought me up the way they did and i wouldn't be who i am today. if it wasn't for God, i wouldn't have the same effect i do on people. if it wasn't for God i wouldn't know the people who i can call my branches that help hold me up. God is the only one i have to say thank you to and i can't say enough to show my gratitude for all He has done for me in making me who i am and everything He has perfectly placed in my life.

i'm not sure what my point was in this blog anymore... i just know that this year, i really want to learn to submit, with everything i have, to just be a better person. i'm serious this time. i never used to make resolutions because i thought if it's worth making a resolution, why wait til the next year to start making changes. i dunno. it just happened around this time for me.

Psalm 23 speaks wonders on who we are and how we should live our lives. just the first line...

"The Lord is my shepherd"

those 5 words alone have so much in it. the Lord is my shepherd indicating He watches over us, the sheep. when king david wrote this, he could have picked so many other words, like KING or GENERAL, or just GOD, but no. he picked shepherd to show us an amazing analogy about the love between a shepherd and his flock and just how the flock are. He's the shepherd meaning we're the sheep right? he picked sheep because sheep simply are STUPID. they don't keep themselves clean, they walk around wherever and have no sense of direction knowing where they should go. i mean forreal, you'll never go to like... a zoo and see a sheep. hahaha. or... at a circus, you'll never see a sheep on display doing tricks. they're just DUMB and they need someone to lead them.

that's God.

people can say what they say about me and my religion. that... iono actually what they might say. that we're a cult or... we're so uncool because it's like someone tells us what to do and people don't like that idea. having your life dictated by someone else... but honestly, i just think people are scared. scared of something different. scared to submit to someone of a higher power. scared to give up worldly things. scared to admit that they were wrong and someone else was right...

iono... it's just... i feel so bad for the people i see around me. they worry so much about this and that. how much money they need for this and if they'll pass this class and how their relationship is going with so and so. but like... God made us. He didn't tell us to worry. He promises that he makes plans for us to give us HOPE and a future, not to destroy us *jeremiah 29:11; thanks emma*.

i just want to be a better person this year because i want to help those around me help themselves and make themselves better people.

girls say "i wish all guys were like you, romeo"

i wish all people were like Jesus.

that's who my life is modeled after. that's how it'll stay.